We all know it’s harder to break bad habits the longer they’ve been around. On the bright side, though, it’s easier to keep good habits when they’ve been in place for a while. We have a better chance of normalizing positive behavior for our children if we start modeling it earlier. But as every busy parent is aware, between last minute dinner plans and sinks full of dishes, habit formation often becomes an afterthought.
The thing is though, whether we’re intentional or not, we teach our kids habits every day. They see the real us. With a bit of effort and a bunch of prayer, we can do better at showing them to form good habits. My kids have not hit their preteen and teen years yet. So I won’t naively say this is a way to prevent any normal teenage tendencies from emerging later. I do believe, however, there are certain habits that, when instilled now, will continue more easily into their teen and adult years.
1. Technology free meals at the table
So this one has two parts - meals at the table and meals without any gadgets or tv. We’re still working on this one at my house. Sometimes we forget to turn off the tv before we dive into a meal. But when we make it a practice to turn off or put aside all devices (parents too!), the mealtime conversation is so rich! We get to hear about the games they played that day, dreams they had the night before, and what they want to be when they grow up. We also get to relate to them with our own childhood stories and organically slip in a lesson or two about loving God and family.
Mealtime is so special. Teaching kids to honor this family time as youngsters will create expectations that last even into their texting and social media years.
Practical tips: Let little kids take turns turning off the tv when it’s time to eat, and invite them to help set the table. For parents and older kids, make a cell phone basket to store everyone’s phones away from the table until mealtime is over.
2. Fitness as a family
Let’s get them off the couch, out of their rooms, and off of the internet. Those things are fine in moderation, but jump start healthy habits in your kids’ lives by making fitness a fun family endeavor. Obesity rates among children in America are higher than they were when we were kids. I wouldn’t be surprised if the rise of recreational technology use is a contributing factor.
With lots of prayer and lots of love, we can slowly introduce healthy, God-honoring habits in our homes.
Guess what. It doesn’t have to be! Use their love for gadgets to their advantage. There are tons of apps to help with this.
Practical tips: For young kids, this is too easy. Just go play with them! Stir up your inner child and teach them some of the games you used to love. For older kids, use your phones to challenge each other and give rewards for things like most steps walked, most calories burned, etc.
3. Family worship and Bible study
Before you flood your mind with thoughts of how unqualified you may be for this, remember no one but God loves your kids more than you do. We can look out for their spiritual growth the same way we look out for everything else! Normalize praising Jesus, listening to Christian music together and talking about the Bible.
When started early, these things won’t feel so awkward as the kids get older. Sure, each new stage of childhood will have its own hurdles of awkwardness to overcome, but we can set the tone in our homes now. Christian culture must extend beyond Sunday services if our kids are ever going to truly embrace their faith.
Practical tips: Add some Christian children’s songs to your family's worship playlist. The words are easier for little kids to learn, and you want them to know what (and to Whom) they’re singing. For older kids, give them passages of scripture to read beforehand so when it’s time to discuss the Bible you aren’t doing all the talking. Encourage them to bring questions and comments to the conversation.
You can do this, mom and dad! Don’t worry if your kids have gotten a little older and starting these habits will feel like a challenge. That’s okay. Keep going, and you’ll soon find a rhythm that works for your family. As the well-known Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”
It can be easy, even for the best of parents, to make excuses like “my kids won’t do that” or “that doesn’t work in our home.” Remember, you are in charge of your household. With lots of prayer and lots of love, we can slowly introduce healthy, God-honoring habits in our homes. The sooner we start them, the more impactful they will be. Let’s get going!
Lord, I want to worship You through my parenting. I hope to raise my children in a way that glorifies You and gives them the best life possible. Help me to teach healthy habits in my home that point my kids in the right direction. In Your name, Amen.
Ask Yourself
Will the habits your children have right now help mold them into the adults you want them to be? When they see you, do they get a model of someone who loves and honors God? What are some habits you should start or stop in your home today?